Don’t forget to fall in love with yourself first. ~ Carrie Bradshaw
I have discovered that a big part of being a Designer is being a Space Therapist. I find myself helping my clients navigate the tricky areas of self-care and self-discipline; of dreaming big and staying sustainable at the same time. This is not always the easiest of roles though one of the most satisfying when it’s successful.
SELF-CARE & SELF-DISCIPLINE
The self-help culture born in the 1980’s somewhat clouded the truth of what self-love really means. SELF-LOVE is not to overindulging yourself, or spoiling yourself, or in any way meant to be a get-out-of-jail pass for bad behavior. It is about seriously learning to understand yourself and to see what it is you need to be your best self.
If you have the ability to love, love yourself first. ~ Charles Bukowski
I believe that if we allow ourselves to take care of ourselves FIRST it is from this place that we can be in the best position to help and love others. When we are safe, happy and secure in the things that we desire and in the knowledge of what fulfills us, then we can truly be the best of ourselves. Like the story in the airplane when you need to place the oxygen mask on yourself first before you try to help anyone else, because you cannot help anyone if you are passed out on the floor.
If you understand your needs first then you are able to help others; if you do not, there is a strong chance you will not have an option to help anyone else as at one point you will be unable to because you will run out of the external support that is sustaining you.
The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.
DREAM BIG & BE SUSTAINABLE
One of the biggest challenges during a design renovation journey is to help my clients to come to terms with the fact that they deserve to have a space that supports them.
I aim to help my clients to understand their own needs and to make sure to place their needs first. It is a bit of a conundrum – we are on one hand told to be selfless and giving towards others, and on the other hand we are of the generation of placing ourselves first.
I aim to help my clients to balance this and to help them to allow their space design to be a priority in their lives. I aim to help my clients understand their space design in a manner that is sustainable for them as well as the world. I use my Holistic Design method to demonstrate that loving yourself first is actually the most unselfish thing one can do in the long run.
Lead a life of your own design, on your own terms – not one that others, or the environment have scripted for you. ~ Tony Robbins
We need to be generous and giving, caring and loving towards others, of course. But to do so at the detriment of ourselves is a foolish and unsustainable approach.
If we do not know what we want or need, if we do not take care of ourselves, then we are unable to be the best person to help those we love. Don’t you wish to give the best sort of love to those you love? The only way to do this is to make sure you love yourself first and foremost.
Then from a position of power you can be generous, giving, caring and loving in the best possible way to everyone around you and provide a sustainable approach to making the world a better place.
SELF-LOVE is a key to those that are happiest. This is sited clearly in the numerous publications and courses that have risen in the last few decades to help us re-learn the skill of placing your own dreams and visions into the commanding position of your life. Understanding what self-love is, and is not, is a powerful lesson to integrate into your life.
Your space is a reflection of who you; this is one of the basic principles of Feng Shui. I have seen over the two decades as a practicing Designer and Feng Shui specialist that those that take the time to make their spaces work for them in a functional manner and surround themselves with things they find beauty in, are the happiest, most balanced and have the greatest energy to serve others.
Taking the time to design your interior spaces which has traditionally been seen as a selfish or unnecessary I believe is so essential to the greater good of our world. Our basic survival is at stake. We need to start focusing on the things that are sustainable and can last the test of time. We can only do this once we are in a space that provides us with safety, security and inspiration. From there, we can fly.
Take some time to look into your own inner being and discover what it is that you need to be happiest and then make this your number one priority. Go for it. Once you do this, you will be able to do all the other things you want to for those you love, knowing you have your own “oxygen mask” on and are fully capable of helping them from a position of strength and power.